Category Archives: manners

Montessori modified for home education.

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abacus

Well, while we do not have a multi aged classroom of 30-60 children with 4-8 trained Montessori teachers, we can modify Maria Montessori’s method of education for our home.

What we’re doing together is NOT “The Montessori Method”. Maria made it clear that each Children’s House was to have a complete set of equipment and set up in such a way that, if you moved about from school to school, you couldn’t find any substantial difference, with either the physical room or the teaching staff. If her Method was to be held up as a ‘scientifically provable’ method of education, then each room needed to be almost like a ‘science experiment’, repeatable and identical in every detail possible.

 

We are not able to replicate her model here. We can modify the main principles to suit our continuing journey with learning though. We do this because we LOVE Montessori… it just ‘fits’ well with how we behave and how we relate to each other, our family and friends, and to the learning process. So we have some guiding principles from the Maria’s writings to draw upon, which are:

  • Follow the child.
  • If a child demonstrates observable concentration when learning a new skill or mastering a skill, do not interrupt.
  • Do not help the child with something they feel they can succeed in.
  • Ignite interest but let that interest be free to develop.
  • Freedom is the matching of Liberty to work, and the Will to work. Liberty comes from having a prepared environment where choices are available, Will comes from within the child’s desire to learn. The prepared environment includes a ’3 hour work cycle’, usually in the morning, where the children know they won’t be interrupted. Where learning is progressively introduced and also where they experience the highest amount of Will, or desire, to learn.multiplication board

Every change we have made has been based on our discussions, where both M and D have had the Freedom to choose, always.

Although I’ve ‘ticked off outcomes’ in both the Board of Studies NSW curriculum and the Montessori curriculum, we haven’t always followed a routine or used the materials during a work cycle. During our meetings and discussions both M and D wanted very much for us to have routines, to use the Montessori materials more and to have definite ‘computer use time’, as all three of us have spent far too much time on computers over the past couple of years. Do you have that problem in your home?

Here are some  more samples of the work we are currently doing.

Stomach modelcakeheart modelroutine

So far we’ve enjoyed one whole month of gently, at first, moving back into a regular daily routine. Last week went exceptionally well. After they follow a morning ritual of getting their bodies ready (bathroom, breakfast… you know lol), they then start a three hour work cycle. Food is eaten when required, but we stop for lunch after those three hours. Two more hours is then devoted to projects and what Montessori called the ‘Great Work’, which basically means ‘learning something they’re obsessed about’. After 2pm it’s free time, and computers can go on (if they weren’t already used for research etc). At 5pm we stop for a 30 min cleaning roster where everyone chooses what room they start in and we all have jobs that we can do independently. Night time brings dinner, bath/book/bed and then I have time to write, and prepare for the next day, before retiring myself.

writing

It’s still a work in progress, however, we’re definitely on a good path. No one is resisting the change, in fact they hold me to task and remind me to NOT be on Facebook before 2pm!

All the best!

 

 

What we do…. and then some

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In the wee small hours…before crashing into bed (probably literally at this stage) I’m reminded that I need to share more of what we actually do with home education if this blog and my website link are to be in anyway useful.

Well their dad was a blacksmith when she was born!
 
Oh wow… that foil covered shield looks shiney!
Battle time… the only time they fight!

 

  • Monday Morning Meetings… we gather and go over what each of my munchkins want to do with their week academically, socially, inside, outside… what ever really. Then I raise the topics of what I feel would be good to cover and we discuss all of what we’ve raised. From this we write up a plan of things I need to do, they need to do, places we need to go, things we need to buy etc. Usually we come up with other things during the week but I have a written record of the conversation so I can monitor what is going on during the week, make comments, suggestions, give reminders etc. This process works best for us and stops us falling into the common unschooling trap of everyone going off to do their own thing, nothing gets done, gaps in sequential learning develop and well… we genuinely miss each other! It may seem strange, but when we’re off doing our own thing we may not see each other all day! Now that both of my children are capable of independent research they get heavily invested into what they are doing. Another aspect is Continue reading →

Conference Reef and stuff!

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It’s time for me to publish a post on my blog. What shall it be about hmmmm? Well I’m not really motivated to do more than say that life goes on, ups and downs…. oh we attended the Australian Unschooling Conference. It was very intense, sublime and the setting was awesome.

We swam in the warm waters of the Great Barrier Reef and although it broke my heart to be there, knowing what tourism and CSG etc is doing to the natural wonder I managed to balance out my own personal dilemma of contributing to the tourism.Once there I saw that the area we saw was fairly dull and up further was much brighter… I like (tongue in cheek) that we may have been ‘kept away’ from the pristine parts… but it’s still something I struggle with. I still feel as though a dream of mine has been fulfilled.

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Why on EARTH would you ‘homeschool’?

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Well I wouldn’t actually!

Staying home and ‘schooling’ my children would be worse than sending them to school! What I’m doing is providing my children with choices. You see a long long time ago a little 4 year old girl got disgusted with being treated as though she was a fool! Being told to stop reading so much, watching other little children being sent back out into the rain after coming to school late, just to get a ‘late note’, listening to peaceful happy children become bossy as they imitated the teachers, well that little 4 year old girl just got more and more angry!

But she had a choice. At first she chose to change the teachers and let them know what they were doing wasn’t right. Of course this didn’t go down well. There was a very sympathetic Librarian who cried over this little girl and told me she was a ‘heroine’ of hers and inspired her to remember what it was like to be a child.

Next the exceedingly grumpy now 5 year old became just like the other children and changed who she was in order to fit in. This was followed by a distraught 5 year old who realised that she was being nasty to her little brother and mother, who she loved very much… but she was free to make new choices.

We knew people who went to other schools, but they had the same problems that she en-counted; parents not comforting upset children once on school property, teachers yelling commands and ushering children like cattle, children being told to stop learning so that the class could do the same things at the same time and move on to the next activity, and the next and the next etc. There was no going back to the Montessori preschool to do extended day… and the regret of choosing Kindergarten was deep.

But the little girl had another choice…

Now, you may think that children need to ‘adjust’ to school life. If she kept with it she would get used to it and learn to fit in. You may even think that if she was older she wouldn’t have reacted this way.

So we did a bit of ‘school at home’ but she was a child who wanted to learn, she didn’t want to be told what to learn! But wanting to learn wasn’t enough… she had ‘lost’ her ability to self educate. She had been programmed to follow orders, not to generate her own ideas. Not being able to be told what to learn and not being able to decide what to learn herself meant that NO learning was happening. From being a four year old child who could read a newspaper she was going BACKWARDS fast! What a horrible catch 22 she was in! We HAD to de-school her! We found a ‘Montessori like school’ but the teacher lost his smiles once the parents left and he often yelled, was frightening and the materials were not presented correctly because no one had the proper training. So we had to school at home again…

Eventually we got into a really good rhythm… learning went from forced to spontaneous and we began introducing much loved Montessori materials, which I was trained in presenting.

The once 5 year old turned 7. You might say well that’s great, but don’t turn your back on schools! What about socialisation?

Through the broad range of home educating families we were developing a network of playdates and playmates for her, her younger brother and her mum! Together there were some 25 people we had regular contact with. Four of those children she had known through the Montessori preschool and one of those was starting at a local school after home educating for some time. The school would hopefully start a Montessori Class! 1 year of normal class then onto a Montessori class WITH her best mate! Too good to be true. It was not without risk. If the class didn’t go ahead at the end of the year would she stay at school? Would she go back to home education and have to become an independent learner all over again? What about Socialisation? She had SO MANY friends that she would hardly see and her memories of children being bossy in schools was still there.

We found out the best friend was moving and the Montessori class would never begin. After such a negative memory of schools we discussed the pros and cons and then she made her choice.

For a year she went to school. She turned 8. She was often frustrated with the fickle nature of friendships made and broken over slights and misunderstandings. She was also frustrated over the immature nature of the children, perpetuated by teachers who made choices over what the children learnt, when and for how long. Programs that sounded exciting were segregated up according to age so that some children played drums for the whole year of performing arts while others got more varied instruments.

Scientific experiments while exciting were rare and given as a display… too many children for each to have a go… easier for no-one to have a go.

I never chose for my daughter to stay home and be schooled. I never chose for her to not go to school. I chose to respect that it was my own choice to have my two children so my life must be about honouring their lives: To be the mother they need and want, to be loving, responsible, kind, caring and courageous for them.

Both of my children have now chosen NOT to attend a school. They will always be free to change their minds but their minds are currently fixed. They have several reasons for this, here are a few.

  • They want to learn and you don’t get as much time to learn what you are interested in in a classroom
  • Teachers always tell you how to behave but people know how to behave when they are with their friends and family… you learn manners from each other and it’s more gentle for young children then being yelled at.
  • Children who don’t go to school get more time to be out and about and learn how to be part of the community. We get time to talk about lots of stuff with heaps of people; in shops, at parks, with friends and their parents and their brothers and sisters. You get to talk more and it helps you to grow to be more aware of other people’s thoughts and feelings
  • If you really want to lean something you can learn it right away. It’s easier to learn things when you are interested in it. At school you have to learn what the teacher wants you to know and everyone is hurrying up to be the fastest one finished the work. It’s not really as good for learning.
  • When you learn something and understand it you can use it right away, like maths or knowing how to spell a word. At school you have to do the same work over and over again and you end up getting bored of it. Also you can forget to use it in real life. It’s much better to learn how to do something and then just use it! Worksheets with the same questions on them are not as good as learning it in real life.
So I set up a learning space in the house, use some common values that we have discussed together and agreed upon, organise for sports, science, art, music, nature, playdates, excursions, library visits and other outside the home activities, spend time with them discussing what they are interested in and supporting them in every way I can. I read the board of studies requirements and observe that they naturally learn most of it themselves! When they don’t I point out what still needs to be covered and we discuss the subject, Google for information, a game or what other relevant and interesting way to learn that information or skill and then they have finished what ‘the other children are doing in schools’… well what subjects they cover. Usually it takes about a third of one year to do a whole years work learning this way. Still they are attentive to learning on average 45 hours per week, although they are required to only do 25 hours. Apparently in schools children have on average 90 minutes of quality learning per day… 
It’s not stressful, it’s a privilege that they want me to be part of their lives and this time moves fast. To watch them learn everyday and become more confident, willing and able to be themselves is nothing short of amazing! I mean, I chose to have them but they choose to love me and all because I respect them and put their needs in the forefront of my choices. I don’t ‘homeschool’ them… I house their bodies but not their minds! They are self educating beings driven by their own curiosity and passions. My dd is obsessed with reading and science and my ds loves to create buildings, machines and factories in his mind, on paper, on the computer, with lego, with math materials… with the cat if he stays still long enough!
They are learning from within themselves that their desire to learn has a theme and they match that theme to the world around them, bringing their imagination to it, watching how others have created and discovered ideas and solutions; learning about scientists, architects, authors and engineers. They learn about the childhood’s of these creators, what they thought about and felt, what other things they were interested in and how their life’s work made a difference to others. They know that a small child playing with crayons can be the making of a designer, a small scale home movie can teach you something, just be a fun activity, can entertain others or be be a Tropfest junior entry!
No… I don’t see why ANYONE would ‘homeschool’ either! Keeping them indoors and making them do worksheets from 9-3? Actually… I don’t know anyone who DOES do that!

World Kindness day and Home Education Week, a perfect combination

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World kindness day immediately precedes Home Education week. As we are encouraged to see more similarities than differences between countries and cultures it’s a perfect opportunity to examine our values and attitudes towards all of the people within our community. The smallest group we belong to is that of our immediate family. The biggest responsibility is towards our children.  Over this week I would like to outline some information that you may find useful. I hope to spark your mind into thinking about your own situation and weather or not you could make any changes for your family.
Home Education Week is a time to learn more about this method of education and check to see whether it could be a viable option for your family, what you could take from this method to compliment what you already do and to celebrate the people who make this choice with their children. Surely examining what our children are expected to do with their childhoods against what they need and want is one of the kindest things we as parents can do.
The foundations we help our children lay will carry them through into their lives as they reach for their dreams, achieve independence and take on the role of nurturing the next generation. A kind act we as parents can commit to every day of the year is to think of our children’s needs . Taking care of their physical lives with sufficient food, water, rest and exercise is a fundamental  right of every child yet as we know not every child in the world experiences this. A sense of security, belonging, safety and love allows our children to develop mentally without many of the blockages which cause people stress and strain throughout their adult lives; child hood trauma leaves internal scars.
Emotional development of humans is still over looked by many as a distraction from work. Being detached from situations emotionally, toughening up and growing thick skin is prized within our socio-economic structure. This is the same structure that was born from the industrial age where distractions from work could not only loose you your job but threaten to stall production for an entire factory. Justifiably peer pressure to work no matter what you were feeling was encouraged and often striking for better rights was considered going against the status quo, earning the offenders not only a sacking but also a social label that was difficult to shake off, unless you were willing to go back to work, tail between you legs and beg for your job back. Falling into line was mandatory. You had no choice but to work how and when you were told.
After some time, as machines took over for people and many lives had been lost working in dangerous professions groups of workers were successful in striking for better working conditions, especially through the Union movements. It is because of this wave of courage that we enjoy much better working conditions than our ancestors  endured, including the right to work.
Our children’s needs differ from adult’s needs. One fundamental and easily forgotten need is to fulfil the desire to learn. As new people, children are often eager and hungry to make sense of the world and to participate in it.  Even as 2 and 3 year olds children want to help around the house, know what a word says and watch an act, movie or listen to a story over and over again, taking in what they are learning through their senses, making sense of a complicated world.
Children are the experts when it comes to learning. Just by watching what a child is doing and trying to work out what they are trying to learn, from their perspective, is the best way to help your child to learn. Once you do this you are in the prime zone of helping them should they need help. At times staying  out of the way is the best help you can be.
Tomorrow, as this series continues, we’ll go into more detail about helping your child learn through observation – what to look for, what to do and not do and how you can promote more opportunities for learning within your home and when out and about.